Sharing information with others is how we get to know one another. It makes us vulnerable and makes way for connections and friendships to be formed but understanding when it’s too much is just as important as sharing. It is also important to know when it is time to stop pushing for others to share as well. Some things are meant to be kept to yourself, while others are not as open to being vulnerable as you may be, so understanding what is and isn’t crossing boundaries is pivotal for making and maintaining friendships, as well as thriving in a college setting.
Not all information is shared verbally. In this day in age, we are able to share every minuscule thought we have with a click of a button. Social media allows people to expose their lives to the whole world, but it is not always a good thing to do so. When asked, 39% of people between 18 and 49 say that they “we’re very concerned with an inclusion of privacy.” and “students want to protect their information regarding their personal lives and academic or professional prospects.” (Park and Vance, 2021). When in college, having too much exposure online can lead to trouble when getting jobs. Keeping what you do with your friends that may not be considered appropriate private is ideal when making a face for yourself, especially since it is so easy to find your information. It is also important to explain what you expect from them when respecting your boundaries of what to keep private in general when speaking to your friends, or what they may post about you on their own social media. College is a game of competition, and no one wants to be held a few steps back because of something that can be avoided or be the one who does that to a friend, which is why it is so important to understand others’ privacy. Yet, for those with various abilities, it may be more difficult to understand these boundaries despite it being so paramount to do so. Teaching those with assorted differences “about boundaries protects them from harm and unwanted behavior and teaches skills to navigate social systems.” (Evan, 2017). In college, learning how to properly go about boundaries and privacy is not just important for jobs, but for friendships. No one wants to be alone. College is supposed to be fun and filled with social experiences but being bad at keeping secrets or consistently overstepping physical boundaries can cause people not to want to be around you as much. It is okay to admit that understanding how to respect boundaries by not sharing and overstepping too much and keeping what needs to be private, private, is hard. For some, it just doesn’t come as easily as for others, which is why the College Life Skills Program developed a well-versed program to help teach these sorts of skills.
Respecting yourself as well as your friends is one of the main factors needed to live a happy life in college. No one wants to feel like their privacy and personal boundaries are being impeded on, which is why if you are struggling with understanding how to keep a balance between them and your daily life, the CollegeLSP is here to help. Figuring out what your boundaries are is the first step, along with noting that of your friends, and with both of these skills under your belt it will be easy to accommodate for others, and therefore have them do the same. So, if you or someone you know is struggling with privacy and boundaries, trust CollegeLSP to help.
Dr. Eric J. Nach, Ph.D., M.Ed., A.S.D.C., is a Developmental and Behavioral Specialist who specializes in Autism, ADHD and related disorders. Dr. Nach is the founder of the College Life Skills Program where he and his team of professional’s help develop the Emotional Maturity, Executive Functioning, Life Skill and Social Abilities of college students and those high school students preparing for college. The CollegeLSP is a subsidiary program of the Support For Students Growth Center, located in Boca Raton, FL and providing services nationwide.
Evan. “We Need to Talk about Boundaries – The Missing Link in Special Education.” Circles Social Skills Utility™ On IOS and Android, 10 Aug. 2017, https://www.circlesapp.com/how-do-we-teach-students-about-social-boundaries/.
Park, Jasmine, and Amelia Vance. “Data Privacy in Higher Education: Yes, Students Care.” EDUCAUSE Review, 11 Feb. 2021, https://er.educause.edu/articles/2021/2/data-privacy-in-higher-education-yes-students-care.
