Adult social skills before, during, and after college are needed for not only making and maintaining friendships but comfortability in real-life social situations, such as work, relationships and class. Surface-level thinking makes us believe social skills are only how we speak and act towards others, but it is more than that. It’s being able to read body language and understanding the thoughts and perceptions of others (Theory of Mind), along with non-verbal communication. It’s respecting boundaries and incorporating skills taught which are part of the “hidden curriculum” to ensure that young adults can thrive socially in situations such as college, relationships and work so that they are able to enjoy their independent life without being limited by social anxiety. All these factors are what make adult social skills so important, since, without them, young adults attempting to spark an independent social life and lifestyle may struggle. Those with ADHD, Autism, “Asperger’s,” social challenges, etc. may have a particularly hard time doing so, but they can acquire the skills to flourish socially and maturely.
Attempting to socialize and failing can make it difficult for those with life challenges to put themselves out there, which unfortunately leads to isolated young adulthood. If young adults struggle with understanding the thoughts and perceptions of peers, reading body language, or non-verbal communication, they can have a hard time understanding what others around them are trying to say without actually saying it. Lacking this skill can then lead to rejection, and rejection leads to not wanting to socialize anymore due to anxiety, which can finally lead to isolation. The importance in developing these skills is so valuable that not doing so can make our young adult one of the following statistics. A study states, “Nearly 40 percent of young adults with [life challenges] never saw friends and half were not receiving any phone calls or being invited to activities, according to research published recently in the Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders. Strikingly, researchers said that 28 percent had no social contact at all.” (Heasley, 2013). Between the COVID pandemic and the amount of technology consumed by young adults today, socializing can become more difficult for them to do because of how easy it is to avoid in person communication. Which is why being able to tell when your peers are open to making a connection, you are able to act on the opportunity. Other skills such as understanding how to make and respect boundaries as well as all the skills of the “hidden curriculum” contain are how young adults learn to maintain relationships since socializing doesn’t stop at initiating friendships. After speaking, it is important that young adults push to nurture the friendships they had made, even though it can be easy to forget to do so. Since college-aged students are so wrapped up in the whirlwind of emotions and change in their own world, it can be easy to forget others around us are feeling a similar way. Therefore, it is so important for young adults to know how to ask about their friends’ personal lives in a way that respects their boundaries to ensure they are okay so they will be there for you in return. In college, people can feel alone. It can be just as hard for others to make friends as it is for you, which is why putting yourself out there is good, even if it feels as if it’s not. When surveyed, “nearly 48,000 college students, 64% said they had felt “very lonely” in the previous 12 months, while only 19% reported they never felt lonely…” (Murphy, 2020). Knowing others may be in the same boat as you can ease young adults’ minds when trying to socialize, and having the proper skill sets to do so can make it even easier for them, which is why adult social skills are so important.
Having social skills helps with more than just making friends. It allows young adults to have an outlet to go to, a sense of comfort when away from home, and so much more to ensure that their time before, during, and after college is an enjoyable one. At the College Life Skills program, we understand the complexities of this importance. Our team of Doctoral and Master level professionals utilize our individualized, proprietary, evidence-based approaches with the real life experience of thousands of students over the past 3 decades. If your young adult is struggling with making friends or the transition into adulthood, CollegeLSP has the tools to aid them in achieving such skills.
At CollegeLSP, we help those who are college bound, in college, and even those after college learn the proper skill sets to flourish in life. Social skills such as understanding non-verbal communication can help those with life challenges become confident in social situations, whether it be at school, work or with friends and family to prevent them from shying away from independent adult life. College is a place for learning and growth, so if your young adult is struggling with social skills, CollegeLSP is the place to provide them with the ideal support they may need to thrive.
Dr. Eric J. Nach, Ph.D., M.Ed., A.S.D.C., is a Developmental and Behavioral Specialist who specializes in Autism, ADHD and related disorders. Dr. Nach is the founder of the College Life Skills Program where he and his team of professional’s help develop the Emotional Maturity, Executive Functioning, Life Skill and Social Abilities of college students and those high school students preparing for college. The CollegeLSP is a subsidiary program of the Support For Students Growth Center, located in Boca Raton, FL and providing services nationwide.
Murphy. (2020, January 29). Campus loneliness fact sheet. The Foundation for Art & Healing. Retrieved September 8, 2022, from https://www.artandhealing.org/campus-loneliness-fact-sheet/
Heasley, S. (2013, May 14). Study: Nearly 1 in 3 with autism socially isolated. Disability Scoop. Retrieved September 8, 2022, from https://www.disabilityscoop.com/2013/05/08/study-socially-isolated/17905/
