I just can’t handle it…
For one neurodivergent young man, change was something that had always given him anxiety. He liked things to stay the way they were, yet when he went off to college, he realized that wouldn’t be the case. Unlike high school, which allowed him to follow a strict schedule, college forced him to change his life almost daily. Between not having the same classes every day, professors not always following the syllabus to a T, and his roommate doing chores and other things at different times every day, the young man realized college would be more difficult than he anticipated.
As time went on, the stress of knowing that change would inevitably be coming caused the young man to try and avoid it all together. He would often avoid classes in fear that the professors would change assignment due dates and not go out with friends in case they decided to change plans last minute. This then caused college to become lonely for the young man, and as he became isolated, his grades began to slip because of his poor attendance. As time went on, the young man was put on academic probation, and before he could be kicked out, his parents decided to take action by contacting The College Life Skills Program.
There, he met with a coach weekly so he could strengthen these life skills by learning and applying strategies such as practicing changing his schedule on his own. He would change one thing a day to try and get used to not having his schedule be exactly the same each day, along with other techniques to try and learn how to manage change at an adult level. As he received this coaching, with a level of accountability, his ability to handle independent life flourished, preventing him from being kicked out of college due to his poor ability to manage change.
In college, change is inevitable. Between having to move to a new place and having a newfound freedom, this time in a young adult’s life is full of changes that can affect their daily lives. Their parents may not be there to hold their hand and accept and adapt to the change for them, and if they are unable to shift with the changes, then college will become a difficult place for them. Between professors changing their syllabus, classrooms, meeting times, and assignments, rooms and roommates changing, classes and professors changing every semester and sometimes even during one, college students need to be prepared. If not, they can easily become overwhelmed with the anxiety and stress that comes with change, which can cause them to not want to return to college. If they are constantly so worried about the chance of a change happening and are unable to deal with it during, then college will quickly become a place they cannot relax or be happy, especially if they have neurodivergent traits. One source explains how “Sometimes, as neurodivergent people, we struggle to adapt to change, stress, and conflict.” (neff, 2023).
If young adults are constantly struggling to adapt, then they will most likely be unable to thrive both during and after college, since the workplace is constantly changing as well. Much like college, every workday is different from the last, and to be successful both in college and after, we must learn how to effectively handle any change that is thrown at us. Another source explains how “To thrive in college, students must master balancing their personal life, academic responsibilities, and social engagements. Prioritization and setting boundaries are essential in maintaining a healthy balance and preventing stress.” (BAU, 2023). If a young adult lacks this life skill, life itself will become difficult to manage. They may be too occupied with anticipating change that when it happens, they may not be able to handle it, or if they do not anticipate enough, they may be unequip to adapt to the change as it is happening, causing them to fall behind. Yet, this life skill is something that can be learned.
At the College Life Skills Program, our team of Doctoral and Master level professionals utilizes a series of highly individualized strategies, services, and techniques to help neurodivergent young adults who are college bound, in college, and even after college succeed in and after their transition into independent life. We help teach them life skills such as how to manage change so they can be successful in the work world and in life as well as help them learn how to balance independent life on their own, and other executive functioning skills, social skills, and emotional maturity. If your young adult is struggling with life skills, such managing change on their own or the transition into college and adulthood, CollegeLSP has the tools to aid them in achieving and generalizing such skills.
Click here and call now to schedule your FREE 20-minute individualized screening- $150 value.
Dr. Eric J. Nach, Ph.D., M.Ed., A.S.D.C., is a Developmental and Behavioral Specialist who specializes in Autism, ADHD and related disorders. Dr. Nach is the founder of the College Life Skills Program where he and his team of professional’s help develop the Emotional Maturity, Executive Functioning, Life Skill and Social Abilities of college students and those high school students preparing for college. The CollegeLSP is a subsidiary program of the Support For Students Growth Center, located in Boca Raton, FL and providing services nationwide
Neff, M. A. (2023, September 13). ASD and ADHD nervous system. Insights of a Neurodivergent Clinician. https://neurodivergentinsights.com/blog/autistic-adhd-nervous-system#:~:text=Sometimes%2C%20as%20neurodivergent%20people%2C%20we,regulating%20our%20emotions%2C%20and%20more.
Bay Atlantic University May 25, University, B. A., & Name. (2023, May 25). 12 problems college students face and how to overcome them. Bay Atlantic University – Washington, D.C. https://bau.edu/blog/problems-college-students-face/
